"You should be glad that it dies, imagine what it could've looked like had it lived!"

"Don't get pregnant right away."

"Get pregnant right away!"

"You can always have more."

"God hand picked a rosebud for His garden. He needed your baby for some special thing up there in Heaven."

"It's the prettiest ones who always seem to die…"

A couple who have lost their baby, and a single mother who desired this child, have lost their dream when miscarriage occurs. They have no photos to cherish, no milestone memories. They may not even have any movement within the mother's womb to remember. They would give anything to know what their baby looked like. The idea that "you can always have more" is not comforting, and it may very well be false. We don't know what tomorrow brings, and there are no guarantees. Lately, many couples plan pregnancies around careers and wait until later in childbearing years to conceive. Unfortunately, I have had many couples in my counseling office who experienced a miscarriage only to discover they cannot have any more children. This grief is profound and lasting. And each menstrual period is a tormentingly sad reminder of what can never be. And even if they do "have more" none will ever take the place that this child held in their hearts. Once a pregnancy is lost, the innocence and freedom can never fully be regained. As emotionally painful as miscarriage is, it is even more devastating when it is the first pregnancy.